It has been nearly a year and yet, I still feel like an outsider. I know each one of them, but they have no idea who I am or that I even exist. I want to tell him so much how I feel about this, but I can't. It's my fault--I can't face them anyway. I'm too scared. I still have that feeling that he only settled for me. There's a whole lot of better ones out there, but he settled for me. They are a beautiful family, and, yes, I know the physical aspect should never be an issue, but I'm just too fucking scared. I hope I can overcome this. It's ruining me.

So hopeless. I've got a project due on Friday and guess what? I still haven't started! So much for model student. And what's worse is, I may have a scheduled final exam on the presentation day. I hope they won't happen simultaneously. It would literally kill me. Calling all saints and of course, God for help. I need you all. Help me. 911.

exams, presentations..what else could complete a perfect hell week?

Exams for three days in a row, not to mention two on the same day, and a project to make and presentation coming ahead. These are the ingredients in a wicked recipe called hell week. I've finally finished two exams, three to go. I still haven't contacted my partner yet. We haven't talked about how we will make our project and when we will present.

Gosh. Pressure is building up all over me. To add up to that, I still don't know how my day would turn out tomorrow. I have two exams on the same day and time.

***I haven't seen him yet, for one week now. Where could he be? I'm just curious, just curious.***